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AAARRGGGHHH CF-Compassion Fatigue!
5 Replies
pismoclam - September 27

My husband has fms and I have a chronic pain issue as well. I completely believe he has severe pain, I support his taking meds, etc. No belief problem there. But lately I am finding myself gritting my teeth in frustration when he starts his litany of woes as I call it. While I understand the toll it takes on a person- i am in mod to sev pain 24/7- where do I draw the line in terms of being a sounding board? He is normally a very positive person, in fact will tell others that if they have a problem and are upset about it, they have TWO problems... He does talk to others some about his symptoms, but stays pretty happy around them. BUT the minute others are out of earshot, his entire demeanor collapses into negativity and griping...I feel like he saves up all the ick for ME. EEESH. The ONLY therapy he will consider is pain meds and rest. ALL suggestions to do ANYTHING else are met with "yeah, but" . HELP!!!!


Robin1237 - September 27

Maybe he also needs some other people to talk to. Any friends or area pain support group? Also, I believe fibromyalgia is Lyme disease, since the symptoms are the same. for reading, posting and getting referrals to doctors who can help you evaluate for that, plus support groups. Lots of Lyme patients have fibromyalgia.


pismoclam - September 27

Thanks. Robin,
Well, like many men, he has a really hard time talking to others. I have never heard of Lyme's in connection to FMS. We'll ask the Doc. Any useful treatments?


Robin1237 - September 28

pismo, the folks at can help hook you up with a Lyme testing and treating doc in your area. It's best to get tested with a top lab like Igenex or MDL. It's also a clinical diagnosis 'cause not everyone with Lyme tests positive, for lots of physiological reasons. Treatment can consist of antibiotic trial. I went on clindamycin antibiotic 150 mg 4x/day and my fibro symptoms went to zero in a week. That's why I'm here on this forum, to report that my fibro of 25 years, with a known tick bite followed by symptoms shortly after, and a positive Lyme test, responded to antibiotic treatment. We're all different in terms of which antibiotic might work for us. Then people are also treating to counter the nature of the bacteria. The bacteria don't like oxygen, so people do oxygen treatments. The bacteria eat up all our nutrients, so people supplement, especially with magnesium, for energy. The bacteria knock out our hormones so people do hormone supplementation. The bacteria don't like heat, so people do far infrared saunas. Etc. You need to read on for all the treatment experiments.


aliciasue - September 29

Hi Pismoclam....IM inthe same boat my husband has ms . i have serv fms.ive had fms for the last ten years my yrs.with ms. IT IS VERY OVER WELMING AT TIMES .we both have apain management dr. we both see.every two months we both get segmental shots .and theres also medication we both take.I understand what your going through .your having a good day hes having abad one just to keep your head above the water its hard.SOMTIMES .I try to find some time for me like a walk .a drive or seeing some friends or even praying.My husband does the same . vice versa. we made aplain that works for us .i was over welm like you . finally i just broke. so we had to talk about it .we wernt doin any good making the other misrable. when the other person was having a good day . it doesnt mean you dont care for one another .your just keeping it together. so we have an understanding. so when your over welm just take a breather .you might feel btter in the long run. you take care of your self.


Robin1237 - October 4

Alicia -- Lyme disease can present as everything, including FM and MS. It's because it attacks our nerves and soft tissues. Go read up on it at People get tested and treated for the infection.



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